iMedia: following your dreams

Lately the only conversation I seem to be having with most people is the college one.  They say where they are going and what they are majoring in, and then they as me.  I, of course, respond by saying "Illinois Wesleyan to major in theatre."  About 70% of people have the same reaction.  They either give me a surprised "ahh", say "are you sure that is a good idea?"  or just flat out say, "Yeah, good luck with your future."  very sarcastically. 

The other 30% usually say that they are happy that I'm following my passion, and that they wish they were following their own.  Either way, these days following your dreams has become seen as a little ecentric, and sometimes just plain old stupid. 

The reason this picture speaks to me is partially because I've gotten really into street art.  For the most part, the pictures are on the street and it often looks like a gigantic hole or crack in the street.  Lately I've also found street art on walls and the sides of buildings.  Street art is really cool because many people who aren't into the arts find it really cool too.  I've heard many people say that while they love music, they dont understand art, but they love looking up street art.  Seeings as the arts are one of the main areas people are too afraid to pursue, I find it kind of ironic that there is artwork about not being able to follow your dreams.  I believe that the artist believes that following your dreams should not be cancelled.  I don't think following your dreams should be considered a luxury either.  If you love something, go for it.

An Inconvient truth: looking at the negatives.

I have begun to realize that people are more likely to look at something negative than point out the positives.  I first began to realize it when I noticed that no gossip is good gossip.  Whenever somebody tells you that they have a great story to tell, its usually about something dumb or bad that somebody else did.  It is always full of judgement when we hear something about somebody else.  And when we hear these things we never say that the person was probably in a bad situation, or the reason they seemingly randomly yelled at a friend in the hallway, was because that friend had been mistreating them for sometime.

In psychology this is called the fundamental attribution error.  We always think that other people's shortcomings and problems are based off of internal characteristics, rather than thinking that they may be dealing with something else that could explain a mistake they've made.  Because of this we judge, ridicule, laugh at, and even begin to dispise people for doing things that were possibly outside of their control.

However, when we look at something that we did wrong, like that time we were speeding down the street and then cut somebody off, we always blame it on the situation instead of ourselves.  We were speeding because we were running really late and we just had to be somewhere on time.  I know that I do that all the time.  But if somebody cuts me off I assume that they're a bad driver or are just irreponsible.  I never consider that maybe they are rushing to the hospital to see a sick family member or racing to the school to see their little sister's choir concert. 

We expect people to be considerate of our circumstances, but we never consider that other people have them too.  I'm not saying that we can use circumstances as an excuse to mistreat people, that really isn't okay.  Just because you've had a rough life or are dealing with personal issues doesn't mean you can lash out at people just because you feel like it.

Maybe the only way to overcome this is to just be more understanding.  I'm not saying to excuse rude behavior, but when you hear something, maybe don't believe it is the whole truth or that you're dealing with a terrible person.  Hold off on the judgement until you really know whats going on.

Blogging Around

The first blog I commented on was Alex's about Do You Mind?!  I loved reading it because I felt as though we both looked at do you mind in similar ways, and it really has been a class favorite.  She said that she like how Do You Mind gets personal and that she loves it, partially, because she loves inpirational things.

I wrote:
Alex,
I loved reading this blog because I feel the same way, that alot of the time, as much as I love do you mind, I don't want to share my answers. I love writing them, but I feel like they are more for me than anyone else.

I completely agree that these questions would effect you so much because you do love inspiration and believing every cloud has a silver lining. There are so many people that I wish I could know their answers to the do you mind questions, and I feel like yours would probably brighten my day :)


The next blog I looked at was Elyse's about (shocker) do you mind.  I loved reading it because she actually gave a very detailed response about specific questions and I was surprised how open she could be with not only other people, but also herself.  I dont really like to admit fault, and she was more than willing to.
I wrote:
I really like this blog because it I'm a little more guarded about my answers in do you mind, so I love seeing that other people aren't. I also don't know if I'd ever be open enough with myself to admit what you did about apologizing to your brother. I remember I really loved that question because the most important apologies, in my opinion, are not apologizing for a certain event, but more for an attitude or certain treatment over a period of time.

I really like the other question about apologies because until I though about it, I didn't realize how many people I feel may owe me even just a slight apology. And I didn't realize that I think i deserve bigger apologies from some people too. What you said about Leah and how people closest to you probably are more likely to behave in a way the warrants an apology is dead on. Of the people who I think owe me apologies, they are some of the people I am closest too.

LATE PASS Best of the Week: Do you mind

The most insightful activity I think i may have ever done in school is "Do you mind?!".  There are many things  i like about this activity, and probably a few I don't like too.  I like hearing other people's responses.  I enjoy when somebody says something funny.  I love it when somebody says something I can relate to and I have a moment of clarity in that, "that is so me!" way.  I also love it when somebody says something which i dont understand, or something that is a new idea to me.  Even though I love what people say, I don't always feel comfortable sharing.  I think its because I've taken the questions very seriously, and often I write answers that are very personal for me.  Alot of the time the questions make me reevaluate certain parts of my life.  When the questions are something that I take very seriously and personally, I dont always want people knowing or judging my response.

At the same time, those questions are what I love about Do you mind so much.  It helps me reflect on my life in a setting I didn't think would bring that for me.  I said one day in class that writing is my way of expressing myself.  Do you mind has helped me use that even more.  Right before spring break some events happened that caused me to have trouble knowing how to express myself or even if I should.  That is when I wrote my first letter to somebody who I needed to express my emotions to.  I didn't write any other letters though.  Then Do you mind came along and I realized how much that was helping me and that I should keep writing those letters.  They aren't a fix for anything.  Not by a long shot.  But they do help ease it almost as much as talking to somebody does.  One of the hardest parts is just getting the emotions out, and once you do that, the problems are so much easier to face, or even talk about.